“Be aware when distractions come your way. You’ll know its a distraction when you stop doing what you’re supposed to be doing and find yourself pondering things that have NO value .” ~ Beverly R. Imes

I love talking to my parents and hearing stories of their childhood and even mine. The stories seem centered on solid memories of family and history. None of those conversations include talks about Facebook, Instagram or any other social media.  Long talks sitting around the kitchen table, perhaps looking at old photos and telling stories that I’ve never heard before. These moments are treasured. It is such an intimacy to sit and talk without the television blaring or screens to look at. There is a simplicity about just sitting and talking. Looking at each other; laughter ensuing from just being able to relate.

There’s this look that I like to refer to as the “Zombie Stare” — I saw it in the young children at school when I would speak to them and they had to tear their eyes away from the Ipad screen. I see it on the subway when a whole row of people are staring down at their phones and dreamily look up to see if they’ve missed their stop.

The Zombie Stare; a look that’s disconnected from the reality around them, so deep in its hold, that when shaken from it, it’s as if the person has been in a mild fugue state.

Distractions are everywhere. Not just on our screens. They are in the noise that we cannot filter in order to sustain our attention. Whether it’s the clutter in a room or your desk, whether it’s the gossip circulating around you that you’ve become a part of, whether it’s the drama surrounding a situation that might or might not be yours, whether it’s the global chaos that keeps you awake at night, its all distraction. Some of us are so distracted that even silence is distracting. But, distraction is also escapism. Escaping some truth. Escaping a task that we must deal with but want to run away from.

Our minds are filled with clutter. Mine is too, that’s why I try to be intentional about my daily routine because if I am not intentional, it becomes a sea of mush. Getting nothing done or starting projects that get left half done. It is really quite easy to get lost in the dark hole of distraction and miss entire chunks of time. I’ve lived it! I find that the more time one has, the more apt we can be at losing huge amounts of time. This is why being intentional with our daily routine is imperative. Maintaining a schedule and sticking to it is a healthy and anxiety reducing time tracker. I am infinitely more productive when I set up a schedule and stick with it. I get way more done. Even jotting down a time frame for a visit with my mom lends for a sweeter visit because my focus is entirely on my time with her, it is not interrupted by thoughts of going to the market or doing laundry. I get to relish just sitting with her, holding her aging hands and just being grateful that I can.

I want to be present and I am pretty sure you all want the same. Distraction is not pleasant; it can be frustrating and run us ragged. But, the truth is we are are so so easily distracted, it doesn’t even take that much effort, it doesn’t even have to be anything that is fun and even worth it. We are just a distracted nation. I feel it the most when I travel and I see how in smaller towns or countries for that matter, people seem more attentive. People seem more grounded and open to conversation. I am currently in Maine, not much going on here. Winter is the quietest time. Whenever I take my dog Jax for a walk we undoubtedly bump into someone walking their pet; no one is on their phone. Most take the time to say hello and have a conversation. They want to know where you are from and how you got here. I love the simplicity of small towns. I love the quiet of the woods and the country roads. I love that it allows my brain to be quiet. To hear the sounds of nature and the quiet of the night.

Wouldn’t it be lovely, to just be. To be in a moment. To hear the sounds of nature. To spend time with family just holding them in with your heart. To be aware of your own breathing and the sound of your heart. Wouldn’t it be lovely to turn down those distractions in order to be present for the everyday small moments that happen virtually in a split second.

This morning I was sitting in a chair by the window, just quietly having my coffee and there before me was a red tailed fox, just trotting along quietly. The fox, so focused on his surroundings, unaware that I was invading his day. What a treat it was just to watch him and do nothing else, but sit in awe at the stunning beauty that he was.

Sometimes, for me, the distraction is too much time and how to fill it. A schedule can be helpful and grounding. What are your distractions? Can you work around them to find new focus? How can you find balance and focus for the stuff that is really important to you? I suggest start out by clearing the clutter, making a schedule, and being intentional about keeping it sacred. The more time we have, the more of it to be wasted. The dark hole of Instagram can be very alluring, but it’s also watching someone else’s life, instead of living your own. I am not saying that there are not great ideas and thoughts out there, but be careful about being sucked into the black hole.

The world is full of chaos, so much distraction in all the wrong places. Let us be intentional about living and about being present to real life dilemmas. There is so much we can do with our wasted and precious time. Use it to help others, to give back, to do something ……. meaningful.

With Love, Light and JOY ~

Maria